The High Hurdles

I'm starting to feel like Diane Lane's character in Jack. It started on Monday with Peter's 3-month well visit, when he weighed in at 16 pounds, 13 ounces and measured 26 inches. It's time to get out the 9-month clothes! All of my sons are abnormally large for their age, and it's great that they're so healthy, but it's not so great when you're walking down the street with your 3 year-old and people stare at his Huggies Pull-Up like "What's the 5 year-old still doing in diapers?" Or when your 21 month-old, who looks like he's 3, has major stranger anxiety at the dry cleaners and grocery store. We had a play date yesterday with two of my friends and their sons. My friend with twins who are 2 1/2 couldn't get over Nicholas' size. And her kids are big, too!

Yes, we have to double gate the door. It has gotten to that point.

Oh, our little Owen is growing up so quickly! Owen is the perfect example of how any statement can SOUND like it makes sense even though it makes no sense whatsoever. He uses the proper cadence and intonation when it comes to making conclusive statements that are, in fact, entirely inconclusive and illogical. We forgive him, of course, because he's three. Other politicians who use the same tack don't quite receive such amnesty from us...

Me: Owen, is pushing the bed to the gate the right thing to do or the wrong thing to do?
Owen: The WRONG thing to do.
Me: That's right, so remember, don't do it.
Owen: (furrowed brow and pout) But I HAVE to...

Owen: Mommy, may I please have a drink?
Me: No, Owen. First you use the potty and the you can have a very little drink.
Owen: Hey! I have an idea! How about first I have a drink and then I use the potty later.

When I was at K-mart a few weeks ago, I found some kids' place mats on sale. After grabbing about six of them, three for Owen and three for Nicholas, I realized that 1) a sale item isn't really a bargain when you buy six of it, 2) my kids don't need a separate place mat for each meal of the day, and 3) I expect my three year-old to have an encyclopedic knowledge of the presidents of the United States when I myself do not. Back went four of the place mats, but the two we kept are quite useful and engaging. Owen got an atlas, and Nicholas got a Sesame Street checkerboard. Owen (and I) can now identify Russia (it's the biggest!), China ("That's where Kai-Lan is from!"), Australia ("That's where the Wiggles live!"), Canada ("Where's Caillou's house?"), Mexico, Central America and South America (anybody out there know the specs on Dora or Diego?) and we're working on some others. Thomas is a tough one, considering that the island of Sodor isn't real, but we all know that he's from England. It's like Lord of the Rings. Did Tolkien REALLY need to change the name of the setting? We know all those Shirefolk are really IRISH! Nicholas is having a great time pointing out all of his favorite characters, and Owen loves to quiz him. Nicholas is naturally inquisitive, which I find kind of cool. It brings out the teacher in me, what can I say...
Owen spent the entire day today in underpants. HOORAY! Only one accident, which was when I was out of eyeshot and he was watching Elmo and Grover singing "Accidents Happen" on the Elmo's Potty Time DVD. So maybe it wasn't a TOTAL accident, but I downplayed it. We're on the right track, and I don't want to discourage him. All we need now is about fifty pairs of underpants to send him to Kindercare in a few weeks and we'll be all set. The really sad news is that Owen's invisible friend Donkey, whom I had so successfully potty trained, seems to be having lots of accidents. Donkey pooped his underpants about three times today that I counted, though I lost count pretty quickly (when I don't have to change a REAL poop, I don't keep count). Don't ask me how we find donkey underpants, or how we manage to get them on Donkey. We have our trade secrets, and they're all in a day's work.